Last year brought many wonderful changes to our family—we moved into a new home after 20 years in our old home, which brought us closer to family, church and work. In addition, we celebrated the engagement of my middle daughter Susanna to our longtime friends’ son, Bobby Jacobsen, plus two weddings last year, my second-oldest daughter Megan to her sweetheart, Michael, and my own this past August to my dear husband Peter.
Two years ago if you had told me I would be marrying again just three years after Chris’s passing, I would have replied that you were crazy. Yet, God was clearly at work. In His wisdom and goodness He brought another godly man, not only into my life but also into my children’s lives. The weight of God’s blessing in Peter is really just starting to be felt.
Naturally, there was an adjustment period for my children to get used to having another father-figure in their lives. During the time Peter and I were growing in our relationship, I wanted my children as well, to have time to get to know Peter. I also wanted to give my kids the freedom to ask questions, express concerns or doubts, or just share how awkward they felt with the process. God can be trusted with all the details when He is doing something good in our lives, even if it is unfamiliar and we don’t see the road ahead like He can.
“For this reason I bow my knees before the Father, from whom every family in heaven and on earth derives its name, that He would grant you, according to the riches of His glory, to be strengthened with power through His Spirit in the inner man, so that Christ may dwell in your hearts through faith..” Ephesians 3:14-17a
Just having observed my 5th month of marriage, I am amazed to see how God is using Peter in our lives. His calm, logical manner are so helpful for our family discussions, especially if there are disagreements or debates based heavily on emotion (not just my kids!) In addition, he is a GREAT listener! He pays attention well when someone speaks, asks great questions to draw others out, and remembers details of what they say. I think I spent so many years running a busy household of nine, with seven children in a 10-year span, plus homeschooled them and cared for my ailing husband I didn’t have time to even listen to myself think! Listening well has, unfortunately, not been one of my strengths, and I have much to learn still in this department. Peter is setting a great example for all of us.
With a new year upon us, it’s a great opportunity to reflect on the Lord’s goodness in the gift of our husbands. God has wisely provided us with just what we need, though we don’t always take the time to ponder how our husband really contributes to our family life. Your husband might be especially handy and can fix things, or he may be an encourager when you need help getting motivated in your homeschooling. Maybe your husband has to travel a lot for work, but his income provides curriculum and learning opportunities other families don’t have. If you have a husband who prays with and for you and your children you have a real gem.
“…and that you, being rooted and grounded in love, may be able to comprehend with all the saints what is the breadth and length and height and depth, and to know the love of Christ which surpasses knowledge, that you may be filled up to all the fullness of God.” Ephesians 3:17b-19
If you are married right now, God, in His perfect wisdom has provided you with a husband who, though imperfectly, is a reflection of His great love for you. What qualities can you see in him and thank God for?
Ultimately, God is the one who we are most to depend on, look to, and trust in, so that whether or not we are married, single, divorced or widowed, we know that we are loved and cared for. He is our gracious heavenly Father and Christ Jesus is our faithful Bridegroom. Knowing this helps us to appreciate our husbands better, and be thankful no matter what situation we find ourselves in.
There's no place like home,